We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Randomize