y did u give ur computer a hand job?
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Randomize
