Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Randomize
