Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Randomize
