i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
Randomize
