I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
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