How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
