we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
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