Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
is that a dick in a sweater?
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
