ADVERTISEMENT

• (989): View more from Michigan

  if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK

  Fav 2 926 998

  share tweet
  

• (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.

  Fav 28 7122 1220

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (615): View more from Tennessee

  He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low

  Fav 14 1402 6096

  share tweet
  

• (256): View more from Alabama

  I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.

  Fav 20 1702 5687

  share tweet
  
• 

  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (406): View more from Montana

  Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.

  Fav 8 1100 3193

  share tweet
  

• (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...

  Fav 9 2922 1404

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (867): View more from Yukon/N.W.Territory

  Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?

  Fav 2 2335 1890

  share tweet
  

• (972): View more from Texas

  I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.

  (214): View more from Texas

  Does it taste like semen?

  Fav 10 4679 1828

  share tweet
  

• (904): View more from Florida

  Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?

  Fav 6 1975 799

  share tweet
  
• 

  21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (815): View more from Illinois

  My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy

  Fav 10 1740 770

  share tweet
  

• (480): View more from Arizona

  I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.

  Fav 5 3267 857

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (949): View more from California

  Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley

  Fav 0 791 463

  share tweet
  

• (919): View more from North Carolina

  how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?

  (910): View more from North Carolina

  you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.

  Fav 3 957 795

  share tweet
  

• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway

  Fav 0 472 356

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (518): View more from New York

  It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend

  Fav 0 24 3

  share tweet
  

Randomize