I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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