he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Randomize
