Do vagina's smell?
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize
