think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
And then my night got REAL pukey
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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