ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
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