If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
Randomize
