he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
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