im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize