I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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