I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
25 People Confess The Biggest Betrayal They Have Ever Faced
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
25 Odd Things These Pathetic People Do For Enjoyment
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors