swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
I smell like Dick and happiness
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
