i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
it glows. i had to have it.
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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