I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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