If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
Mass text: dear whatever jerk off who thinks they stole drugs from me. It was birth control. Go fuck yourself. And pray that I don't get pregnant.
Who puts their birth control in a bottle with a smiley face?!
Oh fuck wait
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