Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again