Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
Randomize
