Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Randomize
