The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
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