Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
i think i just lost a toe
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
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