sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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