Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Randomize
