So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize