ugly people sure do ruin things
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Randomize
