he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
I was not drunk enough for that final.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
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