We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
