I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
These tits shall not be calmed
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
