How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize