Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
