hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
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