It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Randomize
