I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Randomize
