You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
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