he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
