Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
Two words: nipple clamps
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