It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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