What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
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