Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
Pappa wants mamma naked
we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Randomize