:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Randomize
