you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
