Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
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the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
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What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now