i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
reminds me of losing my job
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo